New Comic Day June 14

Ultimate X-men #71
This is the "conclusion" to the three part Ultimate Phoenix storyline by Robert Kirkman and Ben Oliver. Much like the third X-men movie, I enjoyed the first 2/3 of this issue then something happened where I was like "Kirkman, you are a tool. Fuck you." HOWEVER, unlike the third X-men movie, this ended ok and all is forgiven. We'll get to that.

The first page has the Blob giving a description of his powers while about to pummel someone. A very typical super-villain type thing to do I might add. In short, he got fat but the fat is super dense, thus his mass is really high and thus he is nigh-unmovable. We won't get into the fact he would have a severe case of atherosclerosis to support his weight - not a good idea to overthink superhero physics too much.

So we get a few pages of the X-men getting thrashed and Storm using a line from the second X-men movie "hold on to something," which I really didn't like, but the fight was entertaining and the hero of the day is the new character Elliot who uses his powers to give us a physics lesson about mass being constant and proceeds to decrease the gravity around the Blob to 0.05g. The X-men then kick him around like a soccer ball high into the air where Elliot returns the Blob's personal gravity to normal and he plummets to the Earth like the fat ass he is. So although the fight was good, we don't really learn why the bad guys were there, but since it's Kirkman and he likes to write lots of sub-plots I'm sure it will be revealed later on.

So that's one stoyline, what about this Phoenix business. Well the Shi'ar in the Ultimate universe is a religious group who worship the Phoenix as a creation/benevolent god and they think the young Jean Grey may be the reincarnation of this god. Jean agrees to some blood tests and while they are processing, the truth comes out that the Phoenix is really an evil destoyer type entity ala the third X-men movie and standard X-men continuity, who says things like "let's see how powerful your brain is once it's liquified and pouring out your nose". She tries to kill Lilandra, the head of the organization, but Prof. X is there to stop her. He brings out Jean from the Phoenix with the cool trick saying "I love you." During this momentary lapse, Chuck shuts down her mind.

The aftermath has Lilandra's colleague coming in with the results from the blood tests and reports that she isn't the Phoenix and that her parents were members of the religion. He suggests (and here comes the Fuck you, Robert Kirkman moment) that she heard some stuff about the Phoenix as a child and DEVELOPED A MULTIPLE PERSONALITY TO DEAL WITH HAVING POWERS!!! This is the EXACT SAME explanation for the Phoenix in the third X-men Movie. Man THAT pissed me the hell off. So now Jean (recovered on a basic level) thinks she's crazy, but the bit of redemption comes at the end with the colleague talking to someone on the phone saying Jean definately is the Phoenix, which is a much more satisfactory explanation and is the reason for the quotes around "conclusion" at the start of this review.

How bout the art? Well to tell you the truth, Ben Oliver doesn't float my boat. He gets the job done but some of his images look pretty static, though he does make Jean look good and evil so that's something.

Overall it was a satisfactory conclusion to this 3-parter despite a few choices by Kirkman and mediocre art. And don't ask what those goblin things are on the cover, because I'm not really sure.

Ex Machina Special #2
I really liked this 2-part special showing the history of the Great Machine in flashback and his encounter with someone who could be considered his arch-enemy. Let's play catch-up again shall we? Mitchell Hundred is the mayor of an alternate New York city and gained the power to talk to and control machines and also prevented one of the planes from hitting the World Trade Centre on 9-11. His enemy, Pherson, gains the powers to talk to animals after a mishap in trying to duplicate Hundred's power by listening to digital recordings. He goes off the deep end and goes around setting animals free from zoos and terrorizing an animal shelter.

Hundred meets him at said shelter and after Pherson uses his power to tell some dogs to "rip his worthless throat out", The Great Machine dispatches him in a very comic book fashion. He plays a recording of that command backwards which makes the dogs turn on Pherson. So day saved. The real story here is the moral decisions Mitch plays with as his partners encourage him to cross the line and kill Pherson and the way he handles the radio interview taking place in the present.

I thought the art was quite good despite not being done by regular Ex Machina artist Tony Harris. No complaints.

Good two-issue series that provides a good intro to the Ex Machina series and the type of character Mitchell Hundred is.


Fables #50

Now this is a comic! 64-pages of pure gold and my favourite book this week. For those not in the know, Fables feature fairy tale creatures in our "real" world. So Snow White, The Big Bad Wolf (Bigby - who can change into a regular looking guy), Mowgli, Prince Charming, etc. all really exist. They are magical type creatures and depending on how ingrained a character's story is in our culture, the harder it is to kill a particular fable. A prime example is when Snow White got shot in the head and made a full recovery. Her sister Rose Red, being not as popular, would not have survived. The fables used to live in fairy tale realms called the Homelands, but an enemy called the Adversary showed up and started killing folk and building an empire. The Fables retreated to our mundane or "mundy" world. Got the gist?

So this is a very good story filled with espionage, murder, romance, a wedding, beanstalks, and a very apt analogy. What more could you ask?

We open with Bigby (big bad wolf) returning to Fabletown after being exiled. He is tasked with infiltrating the Homelands on a mission called Operation Israel. He has to get to the empire capital and confront the Adversary and does so in a very cool, albeit fantastical, spy sequence. He kills some guards and gives the Adversay a message from fabletown. They plan to take an Israelite philosophy when it comes to dealing with the bad guys: Mess with us and reap the consequences tenfold. Awesome.

The second half of the comic has Bigby reconciling with Snow white and they plan to get married and look after their kiddies (yeah they have 6 or 7 depending on who you ask in Fabletown from an earlier storyline that I won't get into). And this isn't some 2 page affair either, the build up is there including the planning and nervousness and is complete with full wedding vows. Again Awesome. I was actually hesitant to turn the last page as I expected some "Bwah ha-ha" type thing from the Adversary showing that he doesn't take kindly to threats and that a massive attack is on the way. I was pleasantly surprised when the last page simply has a close up of a table you would find at a wedding reception - complete with cake, champagne and an invitation to the wedding. Classy. As well the art of Mark Buckingham perfectly suits the nature of Fables and only serves to enhance an already excellent story. I almost want to go out and buy another copy.